What to Do If You’re Dealing With a Hesidater
While there are plenty of dating app profiles that make it painfully apparent that someone’s only mildly invested in connecting with someone, it’s also possible that you’ll match with someone, start talking, possibly even go on a date – and start seeing signs that they’re hesidating.
1. They shy away from vulnerability. Molly Godfrey, a trained dating and intimacy coach in New York City, recommends throwing out a small “test”: reveal something vulnerable or personal. “If the other person is receptive, open, and kind, they’re likely someone with the capacity for intimacy and has emotional depth,” she notes. “If the person is defensive or shies away from vulnerability, they may not be totally emotionally available.”
2. They’re not all that engaged. “If a potential partner seems less interested – they’re slow to respond to texts or cancel plans at the last minute – they may be hesidating,” says MacLean.
3. On the flip side, they might have too many questions, expectations, or be overly particular. “Sometimes, it feels as if some people are searching for reasons most any match won’t work,” notes Julianne McGowan, Relationship Manager at global matchmaking firm Kelleher International. “This is often a sign they are not truly open to a relationship due to unresolved and unconscious issues that are manifesting as avoidance in this case.”
…
WhatsApp